Marriage Laws and Regulations
Introduction
The sacramental union of a man and a woman is performed in an Orthodox Church according to the liturgical tradition, and blessed by a Priest who is recognized as canonical (authentic) by the Greek Orthodox Archdiocese of Australia.
To learn more about Marriage as a Sacrament, please read our article on Marriage.
The Laws and Regulations pertaining to Weddings are set by the Holy Canons of the Orthodox Church and are implemented accordingly by the Greek Orthodox Archdiocese of Australia.
These regulations apply to every Greek Orthodox Priest across Australia. He is obliged to observe them conscientiously.
Prerequisites for Marriage in the Orthodox Church
1. There must be no impediment (regarding relationships) according to the Canons of the Church and according to Civil Law. In other words, the parties wishing to marry must not be related to each other. Prohibited Marriages include:
First Group Parents with their own children, grandchildren or great-grandchildren.
Second Group Brothers-in-law with sisters-in-law.
Third Group Uncles and aunts with nieces and nephews.
Fourth Group First cousins with each other.
Fifth Group Foster parents with foster children or foster children with the children of foster parents.
Sixth Group Godparents with godchildren or godparents with the parents of godchildren.
Seventh Group Godchildren of the same godparent.
2. The Wedding date should be reserved with the Church well in advance to ensure the couple’s preferred time (where possible).
3. Every Greek Orthodox Priest in Australia is also a registered Civil Celebrant. Consequently, he is authorized to conduct the Marriage in accordance with both State and Ecclesiastical law. However, he is permitted to perform the Civil Marriage only in conjunction with the Religious Service on the same day.
4. The ‘Notice of Intended Marriage’ for the Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages, and the Application to the Archdiocese for the Church, must be completed in the presence of the Priest at least one calendar month before the set date of marriage - preferably, three months prior. The couple should, therefore, arrange to meet with him during afternoon Office Hours or, in special cases, by appointment.
5. The Parish Priest will give directions as to the necessary Documents, Fees for the Archdiocese, as well as Fees for the local Church. These will vary, according to the individual status and circumstances of the couple.
Documentation Required
1. In all circumstances, both parties (whether Orthodox or not) must present to the Priest their full Birth Certificate (if born in Australia) or their Passport (if born overseas) as well as their Baptismal Certificate.
2. Orthodox parties who have never been married before must obtain a Certificate of Celibacy or ‘Agamias’ (that they are not married) from their local Parish Priest. This must be signed by two witnesses (parents, brothers, sisters, cousins, or friends) upon presenting the Baptismal Certificate of the party concerned.
3. The ‘Local Parish’ is where one has been residing for the previous two years or more.
4. Parties already married either in Australia or overseas are prohibited by State and Church law to re-marry without a Divorce.
5. If either or both parties are widowed, the Death Certificate of the deceased spouse must be provided.
6. When one or both parties are divorcing, they must firstly obtain a civil Divorce Certificate from a Court of Law (Decree Nissi - ‘Degree Absolute’). Following this, they must also apply for an Ecclesiastical Divorce in order for the previous marriage to be dissolved according to Church Law. See ‘Divorces’ below.
7. For persons entering a second or third marriage the Divorce from the previous marriage must have been issued by the State and by the Church at least one calendar month prior to the next marriage.
The Koumbari
The Best Man (koumbaros) or the Matron of Honour (koumbara) are usually of the Orthodox Faith, since they will also be invited by the couple to become Godparent to at least one of their children.
Non-Orthodox Christians of an acceptable denomination may stand as Best Man or Matron of Honour at the Wedding. However, they may not go on to become Godparents at the Christenings of the couple’s future children because the roles are entirely different.
Whereas the Best Man or Matron of Honour at a Wedding is merely a witness, however, at the Baptism of a child the Godparent assumes the responsibility of teaching the child by example those things that he or she believes in. If the candidate for the role of Godparent is not Orthodox, then that is simply not possible.
Mixed Marriages
1. The Orthodox Church recognizes that, in multicultural nations such as Australia, members of the Orthodox Faith might invariably elect to enter into a permanent relationship with persons who are not Orthodox.
In certain cases, despite its strict Canons and Regulations, the Church will accommodate the relationship and bless the union through the Sacrament of Marriage.
2. A marriage cannot take place in the Orthodox Church between an Orthodox Christian and a non-Christian.
3. The non-Orthodox partner must be a person who belongs to a Christian denomination ‘acceptable’ to the Orthodox Church.
4. Acceptable denominational traditions include:
Roman Catholic, Anglican Church (Church of England)(*), Uniting Church(*), Methodist, Presbyterian(*), Congregationalist(*), Lutherans, Armenians, Copts, Syro-Chaldeans, Uniates, Belorussian Catholic, Byzantine Church of Croatian, Ethiopian Catholic, Greek Byzantine Catholic, Hungarian Byzantine Catholic, Maronite, Melkite, Romanian Catholic, Apostolic Catholic, Armenian Catholic, Syrian Orthodox, Assyrian Orthodox, Syrian Orthodox.
This list has been formed on the basis of: (a) the fact that the above baptise in the name of the Holy Trinity, in water, (b) that there is some Apostolic Succession and (c) that they have degrees of Priesthood through Ordination.
(*) A baptism performed by a female pastor or member of clergy is not accepted by the Orthodox Church.
5. Having been baptized in the name of the Holy Trinity, both parties are requested to responsibly declare that any children born of the marriage will be baptized according to the rites of the Eastern Orthodox Church and that they shall be raised in the Orthodox Faith.
Far from wishing to interfere in the couple’s discretions and freedoms, the reason for this requirement is that the Church has, painfully, seen too many marriages confront often insurmountable problems because the subject of the children and their religious up-bringing was not addressed before the wedding.
6. Marriages with persons who belong to the following groups are prohibited by the Orthodox Faith:
Baptists, Pentecostals, Charismatics, New Thought, Dutch Reformed, Evangelicals, Evangelical Reformed, Free Reformed Churches, Heritage Reformed, Associated Reformed, Anabaptists, Amish, Mennonites, Quakers, Hutterites, Brethren, River Brethren, Pietists, Spiritual Baptists, Neo Charismatic, Messianic Judaism, Religious Society of Friends, Baptist Union of Australia, Salvation Army, Christian Revival Crusades, Reborn Christians, Assembly of God, Born again, Hillsong, Churches Uniting in Christ, Mormons, Stone Campbell, Restoration Movement, South Cottites, Milerites, Adventist (7th Day), Church of God, Church of Christ, Sacred Name, Grace Movement, Latter Day Saints, Jehovah Witnesses, Scientology and similar groups..
7. Persons who are not Christian or who have never been baptized, even though their parents belonged to a Christian tradition, can only marry in the Orthodox Church upon being baptized in a denomination acceptable to the Orthodox Church. Should they wish to become Orthodox of their own free choice, directions on the procedure are provided under ‘Converting to Orthodoxy’.
8. A non-Orthodox Christian who marries an Orthodox Christian, whilst welcome to attend Church Services with his or her spouse (and children), does not automatically become a member of the Orthodox Church, and is therefore not permitted to receive Holy Communion or the other Sacraments in the Orthodox Church.
9. In addition, the Orthodox Church does not permit non-Orthodox clergy to concelebrate in any of its Services. Nor does the Orthodox Church permit its own Priests to participate in the Services of other denominations, even if those denominations might allow Orthodox priests to participate.
Dates on which Marriages are not permitted
Dates on which Marriages are not permitted:
from 13th December until Christmas day.
on the 5th January, the eve of Epiphany.
from Great Lent until Easter Sunday (these dates vary from year to year).
from 1st to 15th August, the Dormition of the Theotokos.
on the 29th August, the Beheading of St John the Baptist.
on the 14th September, the Elevation of the Holy Cross.
On the day of the Wedding
The groom and the groomsmen should arrive at the church at least 15 minutes prior to the commencement of the Service.
The bride and the bridal party should arrive at the church at least 5 minutes prior to the scheduled time of the Wedding. For this to occur, the bride must ensure that the family is mobilized from early in the morning, allowing ample time for the hairdresser, the beautician, and the dressmaker to complete their work at the house. The bride and her family must bear in mind that, before leaving the house to depart for the church, the photographers and videographers as well as the drivers of the hire cars require considerable time to carry out their professional services, as requested. At least half an hour.
The bride and the groom and their families should bear in mind special events that might cause traffic delays on the way to the church, such as major sporting fixtures, public parades or processions in the city and the suburbs, and the usual weekend traffic ‘bottlenecks’.
The custom of the bride arriving late at the church ‘to keep the groom waiting’ is not based on any religious tradition.
Arriving late at the church is plainly inconsiderate of other weddings and christenings that have been arranged by other families on the same day - especially if hundreds of guests have been invited.
Double-check who is responsible for the rings and the crowns. Without these, the wedding cannot commence.
The Priest will not ‘rush’ the Service, even if the wedding has been delayed. However, if the Bride or the Groom is more than 15 minutes late then it is reasonable that only the parents and the very immediate family will congratulate the couple at the church. The remaining guests will have to do so at the reception.
The Priest will want you to be happy on your very special day and he will go out of his way to make sure that everyone enjoys the Ceremony.
Converting to Orthodoxy
Welcome ‘but not under pressure!
Persons wishing to become Orthodox of their own free volition, without any direct or indirect pressure from anyone, should firstly meet with a Priest of the Church.
Conversion to the Orthodox Church from another Christian denomination, or from a non-Christian Faith or from a background of no religious practice is a very serious matter both for the Orthodox Church and for the person seeking to convert to Orthodoxy. It is, essentially, a lifetime mutual commitment.
Consequently, the matter should never be taken lightly. Changing one’s faith is the most crucial choice in life. Converting to the Orthodox Faith is not a routine and mechanical procedure conducted like a ‘production line’.
Therefore, the Priest will want to discuss the matter carefully to explore the reasons for Conversion with the non-Orthodox candidate and his/her Orthodox partner. He will also want to communicate the Church’s love for the candidate and the couple.
The procedure
Having firstly spoken to the local Parish Priest, those seeking to become Orthodox may write to the Archbishop stating clearly the reasons why they wish to convert to Orthodoxy as follows:
His Eminence Archbishop Makarios
Primate of the Greek Orthodox Church of Australia
242 Cleveland Street
Redfern NSW 2016
When writing to the Archbishop, he should be addressed by the candidate as ‘His Eminence’ before commencing the letter of application.
The Archbishop will then respond in writing advising the candidate as to which Priest will be responsible for his or her preparation towards becoming Orthodox.
Conversion to the Orthodox Church entails a compulsory period of six months instruction in the Faith, including attendance at a 10-week series of talks on the Orthodox Church by both partners.
How received
Non-Orthodox Christians wishing to enter the Orthodox Church are received by the Sacrament of Holy Chrismation (Confirmation by Anointing) if they have previously been baptized in the Name of the Holy Trinity and in an acceptable denomination.
If they have not been baptized in a Christian denomination whose Baptism is accepted by the Orthodox Church, or if they are coming from a non-Christian background, then they must be baptized through complete immersion in water.
Divorce - Tragic under any circumstance
1. Marriage in the Church is meant to bind the relationship of a man and a woman for a lifetime. Nonetheless, though there are countless marriages which last for a lifetime through the daily application of Christian values and virtues, there is no absolutely ‘perfect’ marriage in this world. All marriages have their ups and downs. Differences of opinion, arguments, and brief periods of lesser ‘warmth’ are part of any ‘normal’ marital relationship.
Unfortunately, however, as a result of human weakness and sin, often due to the couple’s non-involvement in the life of the Church, or due to the absence of fundamental respect and trust at some point in the relationship by one or both parties, adultery, violence, abandonment and other disappointing behaviours can ‘test’ a loving marriage beyond the bounds of tolerance.
The total breakdown of a marriage is tragic under any circumstances, regardless of who is at fault. The grief caused by separation is devastating to the individuals concerned, as well as to their children and to their families.
2. Whilst the Church is extremely cautious and will use all of its energy and love to solve any marital ‘crisis’ if given the opportunity, nonetheless, it also recognizes that marriages are not ‘mathematical equations’.
Consequently, the Church is not so insensitive as to ‘close a blind eye’ to the suffering of individuals whose marriage has become unbearable.
3. An Ecclesiastical Divorce may be granted by the Church after a civil divorce (Decree Nissi - Degree Absolute) has been issued by a Court of Law.
4. The Orthodox Church will allow a second and third Marriage, exercising discretion and leniency in cases which are deemed so by the standards of Christian morality and ethics. Such cases require the ruling of the Archbishop.
5. Once the party concerned has obtained the Civil Divorce from a Court of Law, he or she must then apply to the Spiritual Court of the Church for the matter to be considered according to Ecclesiastical Law.
6. The Application for a Church Divorce is completed either by the local Parish Priest or by the Priest of the Parish where the next marriage will take place.
7. The Priest will conduct an interview with the applicant in order to determine the validity of the reasons for the Divorce. The reasons will be included on the Application for consideration by the Spiritual Court, but will not be recorded on the Divorce Certificate when issued.
8. The Church’s laws are more demanding than State laws. For example, ‘incompatibility’ is not an acceptable reason.
Fees apply for the processing of a Divorce by the Spiritual Court of the Archdiocese. These are paid by each divorcee individually.